Saturday, Jun. 03, 2006: 5:59 p.m.
Holy crap, I have got to tell you about this awesomely fantastic dream before I forget about any detail. So I had this dream, right, that JD was holding a competition. It was being held at an elementary school really late at night. We were in this one classroom and he told us that somewhere in this room was $50,000,000. Also, in this room was a safe. There were balloons in the room with numbers on them. The numbers on the balloons were the combination to the safe, but we had to figure out the order of them. There were like 25 balloons. There were, I think, 6 people in the room, including me. We had one hour to find the money; and whoever found it had the choice to either share it with the rest of the group or keep all of it. However, if no one found it, JD would keep it.
Well the search began. I started the timer on my watch at 60 minutes. The first thing I did was grab notebook paper, a pencil and the balloons and I began to write all the numbers down in order to find all possible combinations. Everyone else was searching in cubby holes, but all of them were children�s spelling books and the like. People were looking in the teacher�s desk, or listening to the safe and trying to figure out its combination. After I finished with my list, I began trying all the combinations on the paper. However, before I could finish, I heard JD say that time was up. People begged to stay and keep looking, but JD refused. When people began to threaten him, he pulled out a pistol and they all left. I looked at my watch and there were still three minutes left. I looked up at JD and he pulled the trigger. Out came a little flag that said, �BANG!� I laughed and asked him if this was real or all a hoax.
He asked me if I had remember the affair he had with some old guy a few months before. I told him that I did. He said that it turned out the dude was loaded and when he died he left JD like millions upon millions of dollars. I asked, �so why give it away?� He said, �are you kidding? Fifty million isn�t even half of it?� �But why offer it to a stranger?� �Because I needed to give some away for taxes.� �But no one found it.�
Before he could respond, I noticed one book among all the others. The others were all spelling and math books, i.e. books that belonged in an elementary school classroom. However, I then noticed a big thick hardback book titled, �How I Learned to Snap� by Kirk Read. I knew it was one of JD�s favorite books; and it had no place in an elementary school classroom. I quickly opened it and inside, instead of pages, was a good bundle of money. I picked it up and looked at JD. �Time,� he said. We both smiled.
I came up with list after list of things to do with the money, but before I could finalize my plans; I woke up. Ain�t that the shit?
Snort the mooncrack.
MOONCRACKHEAD AND AWAY!
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